Untitled

So many reasons for me to go
Too much buried pain
Breaking my fragile heart

So many reasons that I should stay
Too many memories hidden inside Questions to answers
That I need to know

Mind and my heart at constant war
Push and pulled in so many directions
Losing the grip on my control
Why are these emotions want to over flow?

All I ever wanted was your heart
Just for you to really see me
Love me for who I am inside
Not who you wish I would become

Long ago I saw in you a tenderness
There was something magical and rare
The man you were so beautiful
Is the one my heart does miss

Now all that’s left is emptiness
Hollow words spoken to appease
My heart has grown cold
Apologies grow weary and old

Cannot breath and cannot sleep
Everything runs wild in my mind
Memories trap me In a frozen state

Would have done anything for you
Gave up my dreams as sacrifice
Your happiness my one concern

Here I stand lost worn through and through
Too tired to run and too tired to fight
Obligation my cold,dark prison

Too Late / 1st draft

Every day I feel like I am suffocating
But I can’t place blame for this pain
Since I stay and let myself drown
The games never stop they just go
Round and round
What happens when the choice you make leaves you down?
In the beginning did not see the signs
Who could I have been so blind?
Once I looked at you in awe full of hope
Now the only feeling I get makes me choke
How do I stay with you when all I see is red?
You have completely messed with
My heart and head
Every time you touch me my skin crawls
Guess for you i am only something to control after all
Why did I let you in? I do not know
Should never have settled for first one to ask
Guess the prison is mine – punishment will last
Things could have been so different
All I asked was to be first and for you to care
How can I be angry for you having a weak mind?
So easy you let others change you every time
You let others corrupt what could have been great
I really have nothing left for you
No respect for what you became now
We cannot fix it this time
Damage is done
It is too late to care
Too late for sorry – an empty word
Too late for forgiveness
The thoughts have flown away like birds
Too late to change – you cannot stop
Too late to try to grow a flower in a rotted pot
Too late for me to leave – where would I go?
Too late for blame – we both played this sorry game
Too late to climb back on top – i am too low
Too late to complain – no one really hears
Too late to cry out about my fears
I shut that voice down long ago
Too late to end this match – we both have not won
Too late to change my mind
You are not my friend and lover
You are a dangerous foe

Contest

Morsels

This weekend had been one if fun, housework and whispers from my Muse (Thank you Sister Muse) so I was able to tap a few words together for the Antique House as well as come up with some other ideas that I will release to you when time is right!!

  I have decided to run a little contest to see which of my fans is truly following my blog and reading through Antique House chapters I have shared!!

      The winner will get a preview of the last chapter of the Antique House rmailed to them!! 

   Rules are:

1. It is not to be shared as book still in progress

2. One entry only

3. Be creative but clean with answers please

4.  Have fun 

5. Question is:

   What do you think a) my favorite things are b) favourite foods are and c)  What do…

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Perfectly Imperfect

  I have discovered that I am on my own journey in this part of my life and finding my own true voice.  It seems that things that In the past I have tolerated now are driving me insane, whether it be about my husband, people in general or my environments. 

  It aeems I am now having to get reacquintanted with people who have always been in my life as the person I am now! It is challenging in the least but I was always tokd that anything worse having is worth workin for, so here I am re-discovering and learning.   

   My new personal moto is “Perfectly Imperfect” – I am who I am!! I am the best me that I can be!!