Today I find myself very reflective and evaluating a lot in my life good,bad and indifferent!

There are so many parts that are a blur, so many areas that lost their way and dreams and talents not realized!!

I have made some big mistakes the last few years and are paying for them last few years literally and financially!! I know I could ask for help but then I appear again as disappointment to everyone!!
I refuse to ask for help since I got myself in this mess and no matter what sacrifice I will get out!!

I have a great life otherwise, probably one I may not completely deserve!! I have a loving husband who has stayed by me during the roller coaster of depression and anxiety attacks!!
He hasn’t walked yet, not sure why because I would have but he is stronger than me!!

If i could only manage to find a job that doesn’t cause me so much anxiety and I could keep sane through enough to stay at longer than a year!!
I do have a job I love now but its only part-time!!! If I could get more clients I would be set!!

I am determined to get myself out the mess that I created financially without help – even if that means if it takes a long time and with a lot of sacrifice..  I need to do it on my own so that I have something positive come out of something negative.

The debt is my own and I will get it down.. Even if it means working more than one job!!


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